Pub Culture (Part 1)

I love the Pub and the culture around it and have made it my life’s work to de-construct it (not really). 

The Pub is a bigger part of British life than the Queen, St. Paul’s and Piccadilly.  While pubs are declining due to the smoking ban and the cost of alcohol, it’s cheaper at a package store, they are still visited by more than a third of the population at least once a week (those numbers seem low from my observation)

Here are some tips:

When you enter a pub you can take a table and wait as long as you like for service, but it will NEVER happen (I’m not saying this happened to me, but most Brits make a sport of watching the tourists wait for service). 

You go to the bar and get the Publican’s attention.  But never by speaking.  A raised cup, an eyebrow, a non-flirtatious wink is all you need.  Once you have their attention you order quickly and pay.  Please don’t stand there and ask, “Hey what do you have on Tap?” "What's a lager?" "Can I have a taste of the Guinness?" "Why isnt the beer colder?"

The regulars are exempt from these rules, they come in and can make comments like “Ow about a drink this millennium?”  A newcomer is strongly advised NOT to follow this lead.

Once you have your drink and pay you do not tip, that is very bad form and insults those serving the drinks.  You can however offer to buy them a drink with a phrase like, “And one for yourself?”  This is not an attempt in any way to hit on the Publican or server, instead it is simply offering a roundabout way of tipping.  You know they have accepted your invitation because they add it to your tab.

If they do not want the drink they can accept the money, put it aside and when they do take the drink they will point their pint in your direction and say "Cheers." 

Quite the complicated dance for a pint.